Adopted son traced biological parent to be Charles... →
In 2004, 317 people were bitten by rats in New...
antminds: ohyeahfacts: (Final Exits, the illustrated encyclopedia of how we die by Michael Largo)
If you and your friend ever see a leper with a bunch of open sores sitting on the street, here’s a funny thing to say: man, that guy has more Saurus than a dinosaur phone book!
This better not awaken anything in me...
Christians and dinosaurs
Some Christian fundamentalists think that God buried dinosaur bones in the earth to test our faith. But any person with a scientific background will tell you about evolution, and how dinosaurs came from a traveling Martian petting zoo that crash-landed on earth.
If you’re ever feeling jealous of the Tyrannosaurus Rex, just ask yourself, “yeah, but how many pushups can he do?”
excerpt from my deep-sea adventure
I looked down and noticed the rope wrapped around my leg. “No wait!” I shouted out, but it was too late. Hank threw the anchor overboard, and a moment later I was in the water and sinking fast. As I opened my mouth to scream for help, saltwater rushed in and I began to choke. And even as I became overwhelmed with fear and pain, I had to admit – that was a pretty good prank Hank had just pulled.
10 signs your roommate is a serial killer
1. Won’t let you anywhere near the locked trapdoor under his bed 2. Framed photos of himself are pixelated 3. Insists on writing grocery lists “ransom note” style 4. Hobbies include watching kids play at the park and digging at night 5. There’s a human head in the vegetable crisper 6. Chore wheel has you cleaning chainsaws every other week 7. “Help me!” messages written all over your...
off to Spider's Coffee House.
I miss Spider House. Also, Toy Joy and Zen. need to visit Austin soon. jessibelboobstein: hoarr: natface: I am really making my way around all of Austin! Katrina, come find me if you get done working. (Yes, I am using Tumblr in place of texting.) (Because I know she’ll see this.) (Probably before she checks her phone, actually.) (Hee.) Ugh… Once again, it’s Spider House. Right around...
12 Allegedly Funny People Who Aren't →
uprightcitizens: maeby: popculturebrain: inothernews: (via newsweek) This is a good list. Can’t we make Dane Cook numbers 1-12? Where is Jim Gaffigan, though?